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Drinks:
Cocktails Long drinks
Hematoma recipe
A delicious recipe for Hematoma, with Absolut® vodka, grape juice, orange juice, cranberry juice and Blue Curacao liqueur. Also lists similar drink recipes.
Ingredients:
1 1/2 oz Absolut® vodka
2 1/2 oz grape juice
2 1/2 oz orange juice
1 oz cranberry juice
1/4 oz Blue Curacao liqueur
Method:
Combine the Absolut vodka, grape juice, orange juice and cranberry juice in a cocktail shaker half-filled with ice cubes. Shake well and pour into a collins glass filled with crushed ice. Pour blue curacao in on the top, and serve.
Serve:
Collins Glass
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Subcategories::Woman
Jokes about Woman
The desk sergeant answered the phone, and at once
a woman began screaming. "You've got to help me! There's a giant
gray thing in my yard, and it's pulling apples off the tree with
its
tail!" "What's he doing with the apples?" the sergeant asked.
"If I
told you," the woman cried, "you wouldn't believe me!"A man with a talking parrot is getting married. On
the day of the wedding he says to the parrot "Now look here, I know
you are always sat in that window sticking your beak in, when me
and my
new wife get back from the wedding I want you to turn round
and and no
matter what you hear I do not want you to turn back or
I'll break your
neck, do you understand?" The parrot reluctantly
agrees.
On returning from the wedding the parrot turns round as
instructed, and
behind him the bride and groom start to pack for the
honeymoon. The
wife however has packed too much and they can't get
the case closed.
"Get on top and sit on it baby!" Says the man the
woman does so and
grunts and moans but can't shut the case. "You
get on top baby it might be
better" Says the wife, so the man grunts
and groans and tries his best
but still cant shut the
case.
After a little thought the man says "Ok we'll both get on top see
if
that's any better!" The parrot turns round and says "Neck or
no neck
I have to see this!"A young ventriloquist is touring the
clubs
and one night he's doing a show in a small club in a small town in
Arkansas. With his dummy on his knee, he's going through his usual
dumb blonde jokes when a blonde woman in the fourth row stands on her
chair and starts shouting: "I've heard enough of your stupid
blonde
jokes. What makes you think you can stereotype women that way?
What does the
color of a person's hair have to do with her worth as
a human being?
It's guys like you who keep women like me from
being respected at work
and in the community and from reaching our full
potential as a person,
because you and your kind continue to
perpetuate discrimination
against, not only blondes, but women in
general...and all in the name of
humor!"The ventriloquist is embarrassed
and begins to apologize, when the
blonde yells, "You stay out of
this, mister! I'm talking to that
little idiot on your knee!"Quotes universe
At the height of laughter, the universe is flung into a kaleidoscope of new possibilities. Jean HoustonDuct tape is like the force. It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the universe together.... Carl ZwanzigEinstein said God doesn't play dice with the universe, but I don't know--maybe not as a whole, but I think he gets a pretty big kick out of messing in peoples' back yards. Dennis Koenig and Jordan Budde