Non-Alcoholic 1/2 sliced cantaloupe melon
1 peeled banana
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The desk sergeant answered the phone, and at once
a woman began screaming. "You've got to help me! There's a giant
gray thing in my yard, and it's pulling apples off the tree with
its
tail!" "What's he doing with the apples?" the sergeant asked.
"If I
told you," the woman cried, "you wouldn't believe me!"Mandy: Our teacher went on a
special banana
diet.
Andy: Did she lose weight?
Mandy: No, but she sure could
climb trees well!Two biologists are in the field following the
tracks of a radio-collared grizzly bear. All of a sudden, the bear
crashes out of the brush and heads right for them. They scramble up
the
nearest tree, but the bear starts climbing up the tree after
them. The
first biologist starts taking off his heavy leather hiking
boots and pulls
a pair of sleek running shoes from his back-pack.
The second biologist
gives him a puzzled look and says, "What in the
world are you doing?"
He replies, "I figure when the bear gets close
to us, we'll jump down
and make a run for it."
The second
guy says, "Are you crazy? We both know you can't outrun a
full-grown grizzly bear."
The first guy says, "I don't have to outrun
the bear, I only have to
outrun you!"
[Humanity] has unquestionably one really effective weaponlaughter. Power, money, persuasion, supplication, persecutionthese can lift at a colossal humbugpush it a littleweaken it a little, century by century; but only laughter can blow it to rags and atom Mark Twain[Memory is] a man's real possession...In nothing else is he rich, in nothing else is he poor. Alexander SmithA billion here, a billion there, pretty soon it adds up to real money. Senator Everett Dirksen
LARUE - The Street Origin: FrenchSYSHE - Street Origin: Hebrew Because metal was scarce; the Oscars given out during World War II were made of plaster. The average home creates more pollution than does the average car. The only king without a moustache in a deck of cards is the king of hearts.