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Tech Support: "Which format are the images you
send?"
Customer: "Rectangular, 15x11 centimeters."
My new baby is the image of his father.
Never
mind. just so long as he's healthy.
Doctor, Doctor my baby is the image
of his father
Never mind just so long as he's healthy!
[Humanity] has unquestionably one really effective weaponlaughter. Power, money, persuasion, supplication, persecutionthese can lift at a colossal humbugpush it a littleweaken it a little, century by century; but only laughter can blow it to rags and atom Mark Twain
[Memory is] a man's real possession...In nothing else is he rich, in nothing else is he poor. Alexander Smith
A billion here, a billion there, pretty soon it adds up to real money. Senator Everett DirksenLighting Rod Prevents Strikes
This rod prevents strikes by doing exactly the opposite of what they are usually known for.
Hologram Lady Will Greet You at the Airport
A weird customer service hologram is coming to New York City airports.
Pollutants Mucking With Food Production
Two manmade pollutants known best as threats to human health have just been charged with two more offenses: shifting rainfall patterns and mucking with food production.
Starships Fueled on Antimatter from Space?
Harvesting antimatter in space would completely bypass the difficulties of an Earth-bound particle accelerator.
Cement Yourself With Concrete Business Cards
Give your first impression a little more gravity by handing one of these babies out.